[You didn't start without me?] {Nah. I'm really too confused at this point.} [Once upon a time, a girl who wished to be a prince lost everything she held dear to another girl, one who she believed was a witch. But like many who desired to save the princesses of the world, the would-be prince was a fool. She couldn't see what lay beyond the masks that most people wore, and thus became merely a pawn in the games of others.] {That sounds like a very tragic fate. That isn't how the story ends, is it?} [The game is not over yet. Both sides still have to move into position for the final round. And that battle will determine the fate not only of the prince, but of countless souls tangled in the same wicked web.] {And what are these two sides?} [Good and evil, of course. Or so they see themselves. The true faces of the players has yet to be revealed.] {True faces?} [Hidden by masks and shadows, lies and fairy tales. They think they are hiding from the world, but they are only disguising the reflection they themselves see.] ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Shatter A Shoujo Kakumei Utena Fanfiction By Lady Brick www.mindeclipse.com Part 4 - Threads Knot ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ "H-how..." Touga groped failingly for words as he stared into the girl's face, framed by long pale hair she had kept so carefully pinned up. He could see why now. "What's wrong?" Kyoko asked, her voice still slightly groggy. "What are you... oh no." Her eyes still locked on his, she raised a hand up to her hair. She sighed, lowered her head. "Damn it." In two long strides, he was across the room, grabbing her shoulders, shaking her. "Did Ohtori do this? Is this his idea of a joke? I swear I'm going to find that bastard and-" "No, please!" Her voice rose in pitch, twisting his heart. Those blue eyes, one blackened from Tenjou's wild punch earlier, pleaded with his. "You can't tell him. He mustn't know." He slowly released her. "He probably does already. I don't know how you did this, but this *is* his school." "He can't know. And if he does... well, Tenjou-kun is free from him, at least." "I doubt it's that easy." Touga sank down on the side of the bed. "She loves him, you know. She's a blind, pathetic fool who can't even see a snake for his skin." "Do you really love her?" He remembered she had asked him her first day at the school, and he had given her one of his usual flippant, twisted answers. It had only been a few days ago, really. The world seemed to have turned upside down since then, parts of it starting to fall away. The words, brutally honest, pulled painfully from his throat. "Yes, I love her. I think I have ever since I first saw her. And I hate her for it." "So you found it easier to use her?" His voice was harsh. "You mean, if I had always kept my motives hidden behind a mask of geniality, than I could have been the demon she loved now instead of Ohtori?" Kyoko flinched at that, turned away. Touga's fingers caught her chin, drew her back. "So, Victor of the Duels, who does your heart belong to?" "My heart?" He placed a long-fingered hand on her chest, above her left breast. She started visibly, but didn't push him away. "Your heart. I can feel it beating in there. Whom have you given it to?" "No one." "Really." "It isn't mine to give." "Well, then it must belong to someone." He leaned in closer, his breath rustling through her hair. "Is it me?" "I didn't come here to love anyone." Her voice was much less firm than before. "It's not my duty." "So it was taken against your will. It happens." His lips approached hers. An instant before they touched, she turned away. "This isn't right," she protested hoarsely. "What about your 'princess'?" He laughed into her cheek. "I think I can say quite certainly now that she is no one's princess. Nor do I think I want her to be. Perhaps someday we can just be a boy and a girl, in another world. But while we are trapped in this one..." His mouth found hers. Any protests she may have had were quickly drowned out. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Utena lay curled on her bed, sobbing. Its mate sat empty, cold next to her. What had she done? She never wanted to hurt Anthy. She had fought with everything she possessed to prevent that. And yet, she could still feel the hardness of the Rose Bride's cheekbone etched into her palm. The memory of cool metal eyeglasses clung to her fingertips. And Anthy's absence was perhaps the most telling evidence. She had lost her friend, in more ways than one. "Utena-san, is something wrong?" The deep voice startled her out of her tears. "N-no, nothing." Her voice caught, betraying her. "No, there is something..." Before she realized he had moved, he was seated on the edge of the bed, outstretched fingers pressed slightly into the mattress. "Where's Anthy?" "She... I... We had a fight," she managed finally. It was close enough to the truth. "I don't know where she is." Akio's laugh came from nowhere. "Is that all? One quarrel has you this upset?" "I'm afraid that-" "Anthy will come back. She always does. You needn't worry about that." "But I-" "Utena-san. Look at me." Hesitantly, she did. "Anthy is my younger sister. It's my duty to protect her. If I thought that you had truly done anything to harm her, do you really think that I would be here comforting you?" Utena tried to answer, but couldn't. How could she live with him knowing what she had done to Anthy? She closed her eyes as he stroked her hair, unresisting. "Utena-san, you have a pure, good heart. The fact that you are this distraught over a small fight proves that. Now, let's see if we can't dry those tears of yours..." Akio bent over, his lips pressing gently against the younger girl's cheek. He felt her stiffen as his tongue darted out, tasting her salty-sweet tears. His mouth curving upwards, he shifted his weight further onto the bed, making himself more comfortable. It was almost too easy to pull the right strings. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Anthy sat curled comfortably in the chair in the hall. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes, unused to the empty space in front of them. It was amazing how much clearer her vision was. She smiled softly at Chu- Chu, still asleep in her lap. Part of her wished she could have gone back to the tower after the duel, to let Utena know she wasn't upset, that she was still her friend, if Kyoko-sama would allow it. Which she was sure she would. But she knew Kyoko-sama's judgment was sound in this matter. It was too dangerous for her, especially at this delicate point of the game, where everything balanced on the tip of a hair. Could Kyoko-sama and her benefactor really defeat her brother? The signs pointed in that direction. His world was crumbling around the edges. But she had known her brother for a very long time, was intimately familiar with the powers he wore. Yet even they were less of a danger than the crafty mind that wielded them. But the shadows knew this as well. Either way, the final duel would be an interesting one. She could hardly wait. But wait she must. Fortunately, she had developed a nearly infinite patience a long time ago. She knew it would be a while before Kyoko-sama returned. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Kyoko awoke slowly. It took several minutes for her surroundings to fade into place. A bedroom in the Kiriyuu house, softly colored in the morning sunlight. Touga was still asleep next to her. She studied his face for a moment. He looked younger without the weight of his normal calculated persona, or even the quiet desperation he had momentarily let slip last night. She allowed a soft smile in his direction, albeit a sad one, and then quickly dressed. There was a quiet moment of panic when she realized that she had no idea where Touga had placed her hairpins. They were nowhere in sight, and she had no intention of waking him to ask. She briefly considered checking his sister's room, remembering Nanami's elaborate hairstyle, but rejected that idea immediately. She settled for looping her hair back in a loose bun, hoping it would hold until she made it back to her room. She could speak with Himemiya and- Himemiya. She had told her to wait at her dorm room. She must have been sitting outside all night. Kyoko left in such a hurry she didn't even notice her gold ring, the petals glistening in the morning light, half buried in the tangled sheets. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Utena woke alone in her bed. She laid there for a while, unmoving, thoughts empty except for a few fragments of dreams she couldn't remember. Finally, she pulled herself out of the bed. She saw the dress almost immediately, draped across the empty bed next to her. There was a piece of paper lying on top. A note. She picked it up, read it. She bit her lip, blinked away tears. She dressed and left the bedroom, crossing past the planetarium projector to take a seat at one of the twin white sofas. There she waited, twisting her rose crest ring around and around her finger, wondering if she should take it off. Her mind was troubled, but all she could do now was wait. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Exiting the Kiriyuu mansion, Kyoko glanced around, searching her memory for the direction of the dorms. It had been so long... "Lost?" The silky voice made her heart skip a beat. She turned to see Akio, his car purring near-silently like a giant cat ready to pounce. His mouth curved in a half-smile at her startled glance. "No, I was just heading back to the dorm. I'm fine." "Get in. We need to talk." It wasn't a request. Kyoko hesitated a moment, and then stepped towards the car. The passenger door opened as she approached, and she slid into the seat, the white leather surprisingly warm, as though someone else had just gotten out. The door slammed shut seemingly of its own accord and the car leapt forward. Kyoko barely managed to clamp a hand onto her hair as the scenery around them blurred with speed. She tried to ignore Akio's laughter. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ The familiar roaring of the car engine jerked Touga out of sleep. He hurried to the window, just in time to catch a glimpse of Akio speeding away with a pale haired figure next to him. "Damn it," he muttered, angrily shoving tousled hair out of his face. What the hell was she doing? As he turned away from the window, a metallic glint among the sheets caught his eye. He picked it up. It was her ring. He frowned, turning it over in his hands. A rose, be it the stylized symbol of Ohtori Academy or the lifelike gold creation in his hand, was still a rose. His own rose crest was both a key to the world of the Duelists and a collar whose leash was held by the End of the World. This rose ring didn't seem to be either (he remembered how the gate to the arena opened at the touch of her bare hand; it all made sense now) but symbol of choice couldn't be a coincidence. It had to be important. And if it were as important as he thought, she wouldn't be careless with it. She must have left it as a message. But what did it mean? What did she want from him? ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ He knew. He had to know. Why else would he have been waiting for her? "That's quite a black eye," Akio said conversationally, his eyes never leaving the road. What was she supposed to do, thank him? Instead, she pushed herself as far away from him as she could without the armrest on the car door gouging her side, her fingers still tangled in the hasty knot of hair. "You know, of course, that fighting isn't permitted among the students," he continued. "It was just... a misunderstanding." "Hmm. Be certain you are more careful in the future, then." "I will." Except she wasn't going to have a future. "Besides, it's a shame to mar such a lovely face." He reached over and lightly brushed her bruised cheek, laughing as she jerked at his touch. "You really hate me, don't you?" "Yes," she blurted out, the forcefulness startling her. Then, calmer, "Yes, I do." "Good." She finally turned to look at him, confused. His eyes were back on the road. "There is such a thin line between hate and love. You never know when you may unknowingly cross over." The car drifted slightly to the left, as if to emphasize his words. "I'll be careful then." He laughed again. A few notes so rich and carefree. "You'll never change, will you?" He knew. He had to know. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Touga headed for the door, the ring clenched in his hand. Ohtori would probably head to- "She forgot the ring, didn't she?" The voice was soft, female. There was a sigh. "What a fool." "Who are you? What are you doing in my house?" demanded Touga. He looked around, but saw no one. The voice sounded strangely familiar, but he couldn't place it. "You also seem to want to know where I am. Which question should I answer first?" Her tone was rather mocking. "Fine, where are you?" He crossed his arms impatiently. He didn't have time for this! A bundle of shadows slipped out of the entryway and drifted across the wall. "Here I am." Touga blinked. This was rather unexpected. "Let me ask again. She left the ring?" He wordlessly extended his hand, letting the ring catch the light. "What is it exactly?" "I'm sure you've figured that out. It's a Key." "To the dueling arena?" "To the Ends of the World." The sharp intake of breath hurt his stomach, still slightly bruised. Could it really be so simple, right in the palm of his hand? "To crack the world's shell..." "To turn a page," the shadow corrected. "To shatter the shell that surrounds this world, you must destroy its creator." "Ohtori," he muttered. "Yes." Was that pain her heard in the mysterious voice? "And now that she has misplaced her Key, she's going to need your help." "I'm ready." "Just remember it is the fate of a prince to sacrifice his life for the sake of a Revolution. Now here is what you must do..." ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ The world around them had faded to darkness while she wasn't looking. The road stretched before them and behind them into seeming infinity, only the passing of routinely placed streetlights showing that they were actually moving at all. Kyoko wondered randomly if any of the lights ever burned out, and how anyone would find them to change the bulb. "Where are we going?" she finally asked. The silence had been grating on her. "The Ends of the World." "Isn't that you?" "It's a name. It can refer to many things. How did you enter the Academy?" She thought for a moment, decided there was no harm in telling him. "The front gate." He nodded. "The usual way. Of course, how you entered without my knowledge is another matter, but we can discuss that later. That was the beginning of this world. We are headed to the end." "What about the castle at the dueling arena then?" He shrugged. "Stage decoration." "You're lying." "As you wish." In the distance, Kyoko could see a metallic glint. It was minute, but in the expansive darkness, it stood out like a beacon. "The wonderful thing about creating your own world," Akio began conversationally, "is that you may shape it according to whatever rules you wish. From previous experience, the path of the Prince and the Princess was the one I knew best. Of course, there never was a real Princess, just a Witch dressed up in her clothes. It was a flawed journey, but it is that flaw on which this entire world is crafted around." The light was growing closer, but slowly, so slowly compared to the speed at which they were traveling. Kyoko suspected that they wouldn't reach it until he had finished his tale. "He always knew that she was a Witch, but she was also his sister. He loved her, wanted to protect her. Perhaps even more than he wanted to protect the world that really needed him." "You have a funny way of showing it," Kyoko muttered. Akio didn't seem to hear. "And that is the greatest mistake in Man's design. They never want what they actually need, or in most cases, can ever achieve. The Prince was no more human than the Witch, but his compassion for them infected him with their weaknesses. He saw their emotions and let himself feel them. And hence his downfall." The light was taking a shape now, an archway. They were almost there. "But no matter how hard people strive for what they think they need, it will only destroy them in the end. They fight a battle that they can never win, blinded by their desires. They believe they have the capability to change the world into what they want, to bring about a revolution and make things better, if they reach far and hard enough." His tone was amused. "They are all fools, every single one. They just didn't know it until I brought them here." The car slowed, rolling to a smooth stop. The archway stood in front of them, looking out of place in the empty blackness surrounding it. It was similar in style to the entrance of the dueling arena, with a large sculpted rose at the top of the arch, but it was crafted entirely of what appeared to be steel. Lights and indistinct shapes flickered within. Kyoko started as Akio opened the passenger door and offered a hand to help her out. She hadn't even seen him leave the car. She ignored him and stood by herself, brushing past. "You can peek through if you really want," he said, though his tone made the offer sound more like an order. "But you'll have to trust me to tether you to this world. You won't want to get trapped on the other side." Kyoko trusted Akio about as far as she could throw his car, but she allowed him to take her hand. She knew that those who had taken this journey had come back changed somehow, that Touga must have been here before he began working for Ohtori. She wanted to know what would affect people so much, make them behave the way they did. With Ohtori keeping a firm grip on her hand, Kyoko stepped up to the portal. She hesitated for only a moment, and then stepped through- failurepainlosslonelinessemptygonealonerejectedbrokenheartemptytears blacknessagonydispaircryingnauseousforgottenforsakendarknesshopeless sorrowmockedmangledbetrayedbeatenlongingragehurtvoidleftbehindcold paralyzeddesolatefoolishblindedsilencenumbdispondentbatteredanguish voidshatteredhollowabandonedlostdestroyedEVERYTHINGLOSTYOUNEVERHAD- Something was pulling her back. It took her a moment to realize it was Akio pulling her back into the silent blackness. She touched her face, stunned. It was covered in tears. Her hand was shaking. As much as she hated him, despised everything he had done and everything he stood for, she sobbed into his chest, soaking his white jacket, bleeding out everything through tears. He stroked her hair silently. "Now do you see?" he asked her after she had calmed down and pulled away from him. "Everything you felt, that's what awaits people who leave this world. Absolute failure to gain what is most precious to them. Isn't it better here, where they can at least keep the illusion that it may one day be theirs?" His voice softened as he spoke, and the longing in his expression made him look almost childlike. "That's not the real world," Kyoko said, so forcefully it surprised her. "Not everyone suffers like that." "But many do," he replied patiently. "I've seen it. I tried to help them. And trapped in their pain and anger and hate, they could only destroy everything I had in return." Kyoko shook slightly, and put a hand to her heart, as if in pain. "Those who have made this journey, seen what you have, they went back to fight for the power of Revolution with everything they had, to prevent what they experienced here from ever coming to pass. What will you do?" Kyoko stood. Her face was pale under her tangled hair, she trembled slightly, but her expression was resolute. "I'll fight, but for the same reasons I came here." "Which is?" "To destroy this charade you've created. You may really think that you're helping people, I don't know. But you're just hurting them, and it has to stop." Her eyes flashed. "And I'll be the one to stop you." Akio laughed lightly. "Very impressive indeed. The mantle of the Prince suits you quite well." His eyes bored into Kyoko's. "But at heart, you're still just an idealistic fool, Tenjou Utena." ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ {...I don't get it.} [When the masks are finally discarded, the true face can be so horrible, so beautiful, so shocking, that no matter how much one longed for the truth, they will at least briefly want their ignorance returned.] {The real world... is it really as bad as he said?} [Some convince themselves that it is. They may even convince others too. But it depends on the path that one walks, and everyone chooses that path of their own accord. The real world is what you make of it.] {It still sounds scary. And hard.} [You'll see for yourself soon enough. This fairy tale is winding down, and the world will never be the same when it is over.] {What happens next?} [Who knows? If you read a book, and are unhappy with the ending, can you really hope to start again at the first page and expect a different ending?] {That sounds like a riddle... Well, you could if you were the writer, right?} [Exactly. The fate of the fairy tale will fall to whoever holds the pen when the last word is written. And that is the true secret that one must know in order to bring about a revolution and destroy a world.] ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Author's Notes: One of my main goals in writing this story was to make sense of what those who had taken a ride into the darkness with Akio had really seen. I hope my interpretation was believable for everyone else. Thanks to thesaurus.com for the assist. As for the rest, whatever doesn't make sense will (should) be explained in the next part, the final part. It's gonna be a doozy! Comments and critiques are encouraged as usual. If posting a review on fanfiction.net, please don't include spoilers. Lady Brick lady_brick@yahoo.com Disclaimer: I did not create Utena and do not own any of the characters. Though I doubt anyone thought I did.